Lost With The Last Jedi

ME: So, is this the one after Return of the Jedi?
HIM: No, this is episode 8.
ME: Do I need to have seen episode 7?
HIM: You have seen episode 7. You watched it with me.
ME: Are you sure?
HIM: You don't remember? Kylo Ren? The girl Jedi? They're searching for Luke who has gone off somewhere because he feels bad that-
ME: His ice magic froze his sister's heart? That rings a bell.
HIM: You've watched Frozen too many times. No. Kylo Ren is Han and Leia's son and-
ME: I thought you said he was a girl Jedi?
HIM: That's Rae. We don't know whose child she is, although there has been some foreshadowing. Luke blames himself for Kylo Ren turning to the Dark Side.
ME: Hmm.
HIM: You really don't remember this? The ginger guy from About Time is in it.
ME: I would have remembered that.
HIM: Look, let's just watch it. I'm sure it will all come back to you.
ME: Can we not just watch Frozen?
HIM: No.
ME: Peppa Pig?
HIM: No.
ME: [The blurb on Now TV] says that there's "no let up" but also promises it's going to "put the kettle on". I'm getting really mixed messages about this film.
HIM: I'm sure you'll pick it up.

Well. What I picked up was this:

  • Nicolas Cage is dressed up as Snape. He is bad.
  • He is chatting to my old pilates teacher, Kate, via some sort of telepathy. She is probably good.
  • People keep banging on about her impoverished parents abandoning her, which makes me think that that is not what happened.
  • Nick from New Girl is being allowed to play with guns.
  • The ginger guy from About Time has been made to look ugly and incompetent.
  • The thing which seems like a bad idea is a really bad idea.
  • There are loads of extremely weak jokes, which strikes me as unfair given how many of my own extremely weak jokes I'm having to bite back.
  • But there are loads of strong female characters, which is a good thing. 
  • And loads of strong characters of colour, which is also a good thing, even if they do seem to have all the bad ideas.
  • The Resistance has lots of pet cats who were stroked by Queen Elsa while she was feeling sad.
And then I was tired and it was hot and I'd had too much wine and... well... the part of me which cares about the original Star Wars films is disappointed that I slunk off to bed without finding out the ending, but it also accepts that, as the middle part of a trilogy, the ending was probably depressing and inconclusive. I'm sure I'll figure it out when my partner insists that we watch the next film.

The part of me which cares about peace and quiet and grabbing sleep whenever I can thinks I made the right call.

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